This Facebook Rant About Mom Influencers Resonated With Me

Have you all seen this? 

This lengthy Facebook rant written by a woman in Utah is definitely relatable in this era of Instagram Influencers – and over 50,000 people also related to this one. 

The difference between “real mama life” versus “Instagram mama life.”

Yesterday while at the pool I watched a young Mama and her little daughter enter the pool area dressed in very nice coordinating swimming suits. The mom, with her perfect loose curls tied up in a coordinating scarf, spent the first few minutes talking loudly on her phone to a friend while her daughter stood to wait to get into the pool.  Mom ended the phone call and proceeded to spread out pool toys and sunscreen on a matching towel. Then after finding just the right angle and the right light, Mama pulled out her tripod and took a few selfies with her daughter. Little One asked to get in the pool. Mama said wait and then posed her daughter in front the pool, then going into the pool and then coming back out of the pool.  Little one smiled big and said ‘cheese’ like she'd done it a million times. Then Mama told her she could play. Little One walked in and swam around for a couple of minutes. Mama called a friend on her phone and began another conversation while Little One politely and repeatedly asked ‘Mama, can you come in the water with me, please?’ She was ignored. ‘Mama, come play with me?’ she asked 4 more times.  Mama glanced over at her but never got off the phone. After 10 minutes Mama ended her call, collected the sunscreen that was never applied, the water toys that never touched the water, and then her daughter and left the pool.

I sat there thinking about what I'd witnessed for a while afterwards.  I imagined the photos she took being perfectly edited and posted to social media with a caption like ‘Pool time with my girly! #Makingmemories’.  

Somewhere another Mama is going to be at home with her children, the house a mess from their play, her hair unruly from a day of mothering and her clothes dirty with spit up or peanut butter.  She's going to be tired because she's spent her day cooking, caring, cleaning and playing with her children. She's going to look at that photo and she is going to compare herself to the perfect Mama at the pool. The Adversary is going to whisper into her ear ‘you aren't good enough... You don't look like that Mama at the pool... You don't have money to buy expensive swimming suits like that and you don't have time to make memories like she is’ and that young Mama is going to believe it.  She's going to feel like a failure. She'll never know that how she spent her time that day was so much better in God's eyes and in her children's eyes than that ‘perfect Mama’ at the pool. Ugh!!” 

Social media is a magazine – a perfectly curated range of content that someone wants you to see 

What we see on social media isn't always real. Sometimes (perhaps oftentimes), it's a complete set-up. It's staged and filtered. It's counterfeit.

Sometimes we do see absolutely real photos of vacations and beautiful homes and freshly done hair, but it is only ONE moment. It's the very best moment from a whole day spent much like our own, surrounded by working, cleaning, and messes...

Mamas, don't compare yourself. You ARE enough! You are amazing – and the very best part is that you are REAL! Your dirty shirt and your messy house and your happy children are real, and they are proof that you are doing it right!

A great reminder for all of us that social media is just a highlight reel

The Facebook rant is a reminder that, for me at least, the experience is more important than the selfie or perfect Instagram image. The experience is more important than sharing the experience. 

The rant resonated with me because I know that I occasionally pick venues and restaurants based on what the Instagram picture will look like… But! The difference is that I make sure to take my pictures of the food or experience right away, and then I try to be in the moment with whoever is there.

I can upload it to Instagram later.

And even if I were going someplace for an influencer paid promotion, I would still want to enjoy my experience. Because an actual review and lasting connections are so much more important than a pretty picture. This needs to be said – both to marketers and influencers! 

Live in the moment...then share 

So, this is your reminder to live in the moment, enjoy time with your family, and also take that photo (because photos are fun!). Sometimes, however, it feels like work posting to Instagram...so don’t focus on the work, but on enjoying your experience! :)

Interview with Local Mom and Co-Owner of Brew Coffee and Beer House, Alisse Cottle

My Word of the Year 2020 - None